We've all gone crazy lately...lately?

some random ramblings

Monday, February 25, 2008

Blah! I'm so sick of winter! We just got hit with a lovely storm. At least I got to come home early on Friday. Oh, and Friday was 20 months sober for me. I could have blown off work, but I wanted to get some stuff done since my boss was out of the office that day. I am becoming what I never thought I'd become: a responsible adult. I still have my moments when the old behaviors and thoughts come back. I got my period last week. FINALLY! I swear my body loves to plays tricks on me. Oh yeah nothing like my period taking it's fucking time getting here so I got to PMS for longer than usual. I'm sure those near and dear to me loved it as well.

I am finding it harder to be around negative people. Not just the depressed, pissed off and morose people. It's anyone in a bad mood. I guess it goes with being a sensitive, but I think it's something more. Maybe I'm changing and those who aren't changing as well, I find myself turned off by. It's frustrating because these are my family and friends. Those near and dear to my heart. I don't want to push them away, nor feel alienated myself. I feel like no one listens to me or takes me seriously. It's easier to just keep quiet. I know it's not healthy, but everytime I try to express myself I get ignored or brushed aside. I try to talk about things going on in my life or how I feel, they don't pay attention and just turn the conversation back to themselves. I sometimes feel invisible. I feel like no one would notice if I dropped off the face of the Earth. Oh well, it's almost 1:00 am and I got to get up for work later this morning. TTFN. Peace.


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